After all, he is an insurance adjuster and the stereotypical reputation is that they can’t be trusted. Their interest is the insurer’s interest, not that of the insured person making a claim.
This is a copy of the email that I sent to my ex on June 13, 2016:
“I am just confirming our conversation today that you are refusing to pay any portion of (daughter’s name) dance enrollment for next year.
Firstly, she was asked to audition for Team Canada yesterday which she did. The audition fee was $35. If she makes this team it will really help her with respect to university applications as she could get some scholarship money.
Secondly, as you aware from the (daughter’s dance studio) emails, registration for (daughter’s name) for next dance season is tomorrow. I have told you that she is not adding any dances to her schedule. Please let me remind you that she dropped classes each year following our separation to make payment for her classes easier for us. She also was not able to participate in the Summer Dance Intensive program following our separation which she did every year prior to us separating. She wanted to join baseball and take gymnastics camp to help with the acro portion of her dance, all of which she sacrificed participating in due to our financial situation. Now you have indicated that you will not pay any portion of the following:
- Registration fee due tomorrow: $25
- Costume deposit for her regular 7 classes post-dated for October 1: $420
- Monthly fee for 9 hours of dance classes: $366
- Company (I paid her audition fee and she was accepted on this team again)
- Company annual fee—$375 (can be split over 10 months and added to monthly withdrawal or paid all at once due September 1)
- 2 Company costume deposits due October 1: $120
Your 71% share based on your 2014 income is as follows:
- $17.75 due tomorrow for registration fee
- 9 Costume deposits post-dated cheque for October 1: $383.40
- Company annual fee due September 1: $266.25
- Monthly regular classes: $259.86
David, dance is (daughter’s) passion. This is her social base and emotional outlet. It is also what she wants to do for her career. “
I am guessing that with my lawyer getting ready for us to go to court again she has had a conversation with my ex’s lawyer because now my ex has provided our older daughter with payment of her tuition for her first term of university in the amount of $3700 (I think this was the figure my daughter told me). It sounds generous but remember we did have this saved for our daughter’s education. My ex somehow withdrew her entire RESP of $19,000–figure he gave me in May 2015, and used it to pay for entire last year expenses instead of using his own money and my support money. If she had have been living with me, he would have paid support to me for her and from this money I would have had to pay her food, clothing, accommodation and other items. Why does he think then he is entitled to waste her entire RESP on one year and then tell her too bad you are an adult now and have to pay your own tuition?
Secondly he sent me a lump sum payment today for our youngest daughter’s dance expenses but only paid based on her monthly regular class fee of $366. He gave me one payment of $2598.60. I thanked him for his but pointed out it is short $667.40. He insists I only asked him to pay his share of the monthly regular classes. He has confirmed the correct amount with the studio but insists I made the error, didn’t ask for the correct amount, my mistake, I lose, should have been more careful, why has the amount suddenly changed now, why am I asking for increased payment, etc. I see that the studio responded to him also explaining all of the correct information and informed him, as I did, that the Company fee is calculated differently and there is a registration fee.
Sigh. It took lawyer involvement to get him to pay anything. The fact that he has $6298.60 that he can pay and the fact that my account is in a negative situation from having to pay his share of expenses for the past year plus won’t make him look very good in court. His argument to me is that if I could go to Florida at Christmas (accommodation and flight for me and our girls was paid for in full by a family friend but he doesn’t know this) and Hawaii then I can handle paying his share.
I hope that his lawyer will advise him to pay the rest of his share of expenses including full child support. I know his lawyer has been frustrated in the past by his obstinance. I know there is some reason for me to be happy and it does alleviate a bit of financial stress for some payment but in the end he will feel it is okay to continue to short change me and his children. He has been doing that for the past 3 1/2 years. In his mind he thinks–she might take me to court for $6966 but if I pay that amount less $677.40 will she really take me to court for $677.40 as it will cost her more to get that amount back if she even wins.
He should have learned from January’s court experience. If he was there and heard the judge lambaste him maybe he would have learned that this judge in particular was going to make an example of this derelict father. I feel like I have no choice but to continue with court or I am doing my girls and me a disservice. The only way that I am going to be able to move forward and receive full reimbursement for items he legally is responsible to pay is to have clearly written court orders for those amounts that can be enforced.