I experienced something quite unique and special.
I had been up since 3:15 a.m. I had a very busy morning and was coming back from Land’s End into Sidney for a banking appointment. It was 1:00 p.m. and I suddenly needed to eat right away. I went into one of my favourite, regular, cafes, ordered at the counter and then went to find a seat. If you don’t arrive at Toast Café in Sidney before noon you are hard-pressed to find a seat, let alone a table. It was after the lunch rush so I was able to find space at a table with some other people.
While I was waiting for my food, a lady walked in and was looking around at my table. She eyed the seat where I had set my purse and sweater. There were other seats available including a full bank of stools along a counter looking outside to a gorgeous, sunny day. She kept staring at the seat beside me so I asked her if she wanted to sit with me. She said that she did.
She said she felt like she was back travelling when she shared space eating with strangers. I told her about a fond dining memory I had from university. I would visit my boyfriend in Montreal and we would go to this very busy, Jewish. deli with amazing food. Part of the ambience included sitting at long picnic tables dining with everyone else. It was loud and at first I found it odd and uncomfortable and even annoying to hear other’s conversations and for them to hear mine. It turned out though to be a really fun and energetic way to dine and a great way to meet some interesting people and be part of something bigger than just 2 people eating together.
When our food arrived we had ordered the same thing–vegetarian chili. We talked about random things while enjoying our lunch. She shared that she lived 50% in Victoria and 50% in Hawaii. She has businesses on both islands working as a spiritual healer. I was very interested about her Hawaii experiences and her opinion of the best place to live and vacation. She explained that she had to move back to Victoria because she suffered a serious automobile accident 3 years ago. Then she asked me if I had something traumatic happened to me 3 years ago.
I told her that my husband starting having an affair with another woman around that time. She said, “Yes. He made you feel very inadequate about all you were doing and weren’t doing. When he got involved with this other woman he brought up her confidence level which in turn elevated his own confidence. It was just energy moving around but our minds interpret it differently. He still loved you and he was able to live two lives for awhile but the more he focused his energy on her he was no longer able to vibrate any positive energy towards you. You reacted to what you were feeling and then he felt that he had no choice but to make a move. You were completed blind-sided.”
I stared at her dumb-founded.
She said, “I don’t mean to read your aura but you are continuing to be dragged down by him. You need to rid yourself of anything that you have still in your possession that you both shared together. It all contains negative energy for you. When you do this you will shift to a different level and will realize you want all new things anyways. That includes blankets and towels. Give that stuff away.”
I do have an excess of blankets and towels. I gave away so many when I moved but my linen closet overflows. I went from 4 bathrooms to 1 bathroom and my towels are all in very good condition. The ones that are more worn I take to yoga with me. I love blankets and I use them all the time but some were my moms or gifts that I am holding on to that I never use. The ones I love and use regularly are on my couch but I have a pile sitting on top of a chair of ones that I might use and still more in a wardrobe just in case. Even my girls have plenty of their own blankets in their room.
She said, “You have daughters,…two.” I paused to think if I had mentioned this to her. I hadn’t. While I was thinking she said, “The older daughter, she has had trouble.” I named both of my girls, still answering her first statement that I have two daughters. After I said their names she picked my older daughter’s name and said, “She is the one.” She continued, “She is a lot like you.” After that, I have to say that I don’t remember what specifics she told me about my daughter. I feel like it should be important for me to remember but I have to say that I was rather in shock she was reciting my life back to me and I wish now I had taken notes or turned on the recorder in my phone.
The other thing that I know she said was that she used to be a financial advisor before working full-time as a healer. She told me this because she gave me financial advice but I cannot remember what she said. I know she did give me the name of a place to use as storage, Eddy’s, that she said was cheaper than the locker that I have now to store things like Christmas decorations, sleeping bags, camping items, tools and other things that I don’t use on a daily basis and that I can’t keep stored where I am living. I feel like she probably told me to just get rid of it all. I am sure she did because she said, “Start now, not a month from now.”
She then said to me, “Do you have sinus problems?” She started to sniff and clear her throat a bit and coughed while rubbing under her eyes. I said, “I have allergies.” She said that she didn’t have a cold or any sinus issues but she was taking on my symptoms. I swear I did not sniff once or blow my nose in her presence. She said that it had to do with me needing to rid myself of things. It was congested energy that needed to be released.
She said that I was very cute. She said this a couple of times and commented that because I am cute I can hide behind what is really going on. She said that I don’t ask for help when I really need help. She said, “Because you are cute no one can see your stress. You don’t show it in your face or with your weight.” I laughed and said, “Oh yes I do. I need to lose 40 lbs. I eat my emotions.” She said, “But you’re cute, you get away with it; however it can still turn into disease for you. Your personality is full of light but darkness is weighing you down. I have a gift and can read this.”
I have to say that I didn’t understand what she was meaning about me being cute and how I am hiding things with “cuteness” but I remembered a text my friend sent me in September that I didn’t understand at the time that read: “Your sweet defensiveness doesn’t fool me, nor do I think you’re aware you even do it. It’s all so natural for you. Years of systematic emotional abuse by Dave…I’m really sorry.” I went and re-read that text after my encounter with this healer. In our texting conversation preceding my friend’s remark, I was basically saying that I am fine and she didn’t need to worry about me.
The healer then told me I don’t drink enough water. I told her I drink a ton of water but it never quenches my thirst. She said, “Stop drinking diet coke and you’ll lose 10 lbs.” That surprised me. I was not drinking diet coke with my meal so there was no way for her to know that. I told her I crave it constantly. She asked me how many I drink a day and told me that it is my ego that wants diet coke and not to give in. She said that she knows I eat really healthy and she can see I am trying. She told me to go for walks, give away my excess towels and blankets, go cold turkey on the diet coke and I will lose the weight.
My new friend told me when I start to think of my ex that I should move my eyes from side to side as though I am wiping a slate clean. She said that will erase any memories. She told me not to do it too quickly or I could have a nervous break down.
She told me that she oddly gave up a $200 appointment with a cancer patient she is working with in order to come into the café. She spoke to her on the phone and gave her some advice but told her she sounded good, was making progress and didn’t really need the appointment anyway until after she worked on implementing some of the advice she was given over the phone. She said that she tries to get her clients first to do as much work on their own as they can and then she comes to help with the rest. She told her cancer patient that she had to cancel their appointment because she really needed to eat something. She said that she didn’t think our meeting was just by chance. I believe that as well.
She told me that she is a First Nations shaman. Her name is Cheryl Dawn. She said that she has the gift of being able to read people and provide healing. She told me some of the different things that she does using Reiki and crystals. I asked if she had a card. She shared some of the events she had coming up and I thought one of her group activities might be something worth exploring. I will contact her again, however, I know I better get rid of towels and blankets before I do!
scornedwifeblog 
I was advised by my counselor to get rid of everything that belonged to Loser, everything he had given to me and everything we shared. I have systematically done just that. Although it doesn’t erase him from my mind, at least I don’t have to look at something and be reminded of him. I think I might try the “moving my eyes from side to side.” I’ll just be hoping I won’t do it too fast….although, the faster the better if it means getting rid of him for good.
I did get rid of a lot of stuff my ex gave me. Jewellery in particular. The price of gold was good when I cashed it in. It felt great to be rid of it! I knew I would never wear it again. Even though I have 2 daughters I could have passed it down to I needed the money and it meant absolutely nothing to me. Especially Pandora charms. He bought the OW one with my credit card! There wasn’t a chance I was wearing a bracelet he gave me and charms that would remind me every time he bought her the same thing.
Man, I need to contact that woman! I felt like she was giving me a read just from reading about what you said she told you! I did have to get rid of a lot of things that held memories, even a few kitchen items. We don’t understand that material possessions hold power. If I could have gotten rid of my bedroom furniture, I would have. I have replaced just about everything except for the kids. LOL! I will try the moving my eyes from side to side to. Hell, I’ll try anything to remove the memories because with the memories comes the pain…
Anything I’ve kept that my ex and I had together is because 1) I didn’t have time to rid myself of everything before my move 2) I thought it would cost me more to replace it 3) I still like it 4) it is still functional. I feel like Cheryl might have told me something about this regarding the monetary value of things when she was telling me she used to be a financial planner. I think her point was who cares about the value just get rid of it because it holds negative energy that we are not even aware exists.
I love it when these things happen out of the blue. Yes it’s definitely time you get rid of all those things!
I do, too. It is a reminder that life is bigger than our own personal circumstances. I have always felt that God was in control and had great plans for my life and then I got knocked flat on my back with a sucker punch. Every time I try to get up I seem to get knocked back down. I feel like this is a hand reached out to pull me up off the ground and to assure me that everything is under control. Just keep moving forward and people will be put in your path to help and reassure you.
That is amazing. Funny how I noticed I had about 50 extra blankets this year & got rid of them to an animal rescue, I even blogged about how I must have thought I needed them for a big storm but make you it thru & now time to ditch them, start fresh.
I remember reading your post about that and I think I even commented to you that I also had a ton of blankets!
Yep, funny huh. I had to get rid of mine to make room for Davids stuff, perfect reasoning too.
I do remember your comment, and I’ve been thinking how after selling all my exes stuff he left, things have really been easier, less heavy for me.
What an easy way to start freeing yourself – blankets and throws are everywhere, they take up space, they tend to be things you keep long past their wear date. Ditch them and it starts a snowball effect
how serrendipitious! And some solid advice!
and here I thought I would be able to avoid a comment…..it’s “serendipitous”……ever heard of spell check theclap??
What a cool encounter!
All u got today Sluty? Bring it. Cause that was weak. If you want me to dance Bitch… Then give me a beat!
There’s a sad sort of clanging from the clock in the hall
And the bells in the steeple too.
And up in the bedroom, an absurd little bird (theclap)
Is popping up to say, “Cuckoo cuckoo!”
Regretfully they tell us but firmly they compel us
To say goodbye to you.
So long, farewell,auch wiedersehen, good night.
theclap’s a skank, a nasty witchy sight……..gooooddddd nnniiiigggghhhttttt!!!!!
You are wonderful
Wow… Way to break it down!!!!???? Might have yourself a second career Sluty. Who knew you could ghetto rap. Must be all the back seat slap ass and tickle. You are all edgy now. Haha
Maybe Abandon can throw you the Shamans number and you can go test your Karma there. I think Abandon is on the right path… Clearing all the physical and emotional ties takes time. But looks like she is making her way there. I am not sure how she is supposed to shed you, Cling-on. A nice wet nap perhap?
You seem hell bent on being apart of this blog. I guess it only makes sense that you still feel entitled to things that are Abandon’s. Maybe she could give you some of those towels and blankets and you can call it even? What part of your life is lacking that you need not only her husband but her audience as well? Why not get something of your own for a change? Arent ya sick of being a Cling -on?
Oh theclap…..not only are you intellectually lacking, but also musically. That’s not edgy or rap! You clearly have very little knowledge of good old fashioned family movies. That’s from The Sound of Music, with a little twist just for you.
Here’s another little ditty for you with a spin on the title of this blog….maybe you can figure this one out.
Your own personal Shaman
Someone to hear your prayers
Someone who cares
Your own personal Shaman
Someone to hear your prayers
Someone who’s there
Feeling unknown
And you’re all alone
Flesh and bone
By the telephone
Lift up the receiver
I’ll make you a believer
Take second best
Put me to the test
Things on your chest
You need to confess
I will deliver
You know I’m a forgiver
Reach out and touch faith
——————————————
I have to say that I haven’t figured out the wet nap thing?? Do I have sauce on my face? Wipe my bum? What does that mean?
And for the record, because you’re so fucking dumb, I don’t have her husband. Never have. It would actually be pretty weird if I did. Maybe that would be fun?
And lastly, No I don’t want to be a Klingon….I’m more of a Vulcan or Romulans kinda person.
Did you mistake my sarcasm for a compliment? Of course you did. Thats why you continue to rap??? Or some fact simile of a rap song ?
No the wet nap is for Abandon… To wipe the ‘ cling-ons’ off. Ever heard of dags? Same thing. Those little bits of poop that stick to the back end of sheep…
Oh… But lets go with your version of Star Trek!
cling on -Any debris that clings to the hair around one’s asshole. This could include, but not limited to: poop, cotton balls from underwear, other ass crack hair that tangles in on itself, etc…
Cling on
1.loser
2.friendly yet annoying
A term used for a social and academic loser who, in a desperate attempt to re-gain popularity, befriends an individual to the near point of stalking them.
Sound familiar?
theclap….did someone ask you to define yourself? I must have missed the questionnaire in my mailbox? Loser and friendly yet annoying. I wouldn’t say you met the test on friendly, but that’s just my opinion.
If someone asked me to choose what “camp” i was in, it use to be camp cheater and slut. Because no matter what they did, I think the blogger was out of line by dragging her kids into it, and I saw a bitter woman who was not trying to help herself she was aiming her hatred and spite at the cheater and slut and not moving forward. I have to say now the tides have changed, I see that bitter blogger is now trying to improve herself and move forward and all that cheater and slutty has been accusing her of, is exactly what they are doing themselves. They are hypocrites and are now proving to be even worse because they have no reason to continue to engage. It’s disgusting to watch them reply to all of bloggers posts, especially when it seems she has changed her blogging to things that relate to herself, and not using it to lash out anymore. Cheater and slutty keep saying how blogger has no life? Wow, it’s so obvious their life is empty and boring if they have to get their jollies off of creating ridiculous rhymes to insult other respondents and continue to attack the blogger for what? Trying to MOVE ON. Which is what you should both be doing. Any sympathetic stances you may have provoked once upon a time are completely gone after showing your true colors, even beyond your past mistakes.
To the blogger….If this is the slut replying for the cheater (sally), trust me blogger, you can feel better this woman has no class and is continuing to rattle the cage as a pathetic attempt to make her life more exciting. After all, that could be very well why she sought out a married man for in the first place?
Oh.. by the way, I AM also the ‘other woman” who is now with a man who was married to another, we both were. So, my reason for feeling this way has nothing at all to do with being a bitter ex who was cheated on, quite the opposite, unfortunately, I was the cheater! Something I am not proud of. Still, I would never in a million years do what you people are doing to this woman’s blog. The pain of what has been done to her is enough, why continue to add insult to injury? Leave her alone already and go on with your own lives. She seems to be getting over it and working toward a better life for herself. Cheating is already a classless act. What you are doing now is going well beyond….blogger, please continue to look forward, heal, and hopefully, have a wonderful, happy and love filled life ahead.